Monday, 29 August 2011


I don't usually do this kinda thing, but:

breathless, rambling, exhibiting a sharp fear of silences, one that would rather fill space where nothing is really happening with complete bullshit than nothing, one where words-per-minute is a valuable metric, one where it’s not customary but obligatory to choke yourself with excitement when anything remotely interesting happens, to throw diction out the window; the more incomprehensible you are, the better.


Tuesday, 16 August 2011

#hypewatch becomes #credibilitywatch

The EG announcement will be so good. Is the best thing to happen in competitive thus far. Outside of MLG of course!
-Slasher, via Twitter.

To be fair, he could have been trolling, but EG have done way too much of this shit now.  Hopefully this latest in a long line of #hypewatch suspects will make esports fans wake the fuck up.  EG will hype ANYTHING to the moon and back, and it will never, ever live up to the bullshit.  Yes, Huk is the best non-Korean in the current SC2 scene, but the amount of buzz that EG manufactured would make you think that they would be buying the entire roster of GSL with funding from some kind of Middle East Sheikh, Man City style.

I can only pray that TL-goers and other community members treat future EG hype and announcements with the utter disdain that they deserve.  It's definitely come to something when I find myself agreeing with Totalbiscuit:

"Nonplussed by the HuK thing. I don't have time to care about anything other than awesome SC2 games. Doesn't matter which team they come from"

Wednesday, 10 August 2011

Wait a second, i just remembered something!

It's a busy day at the Zechs Files office (which consists of my desk, which is missing two of its three drawers and has two empty ale bottles - yes, ale*).  We've published some softcore porn, and wrote an actual column for ESFI at last!

But while watching GSL VODs, a thought just struck me about an argument that happened two or three months ago.  That's the Zechs Files; always at the cutting edge of esports news!

You may remember the furore revolving around an article published on Team Liquid called The Elephant in the Room.  The basic, misguided premise of the article was that SC2 competition will never be valid until the Bonjwa's and their ilk move over Brood War.  There are obvious flaws with this argument, which i won't go into again, but one skipped my mind at the time.

The idea of the article was that MC dominating the game (as he was at the time) is laughable, because he had an awful record in professional BW.  Well, that kind of stands to reason at first glance.  Except... BW is a game with 10 years of knowledge, with a genuinely professional scene and players who have years of experience and practice.  The fact that MC even made it to the best-of-the best league means that he was one of the best players in the world.  So what if his record was 1-15 or something and his nickname was Suicide Toss (which doesn't technically make sense, by the way, but a nickname is a nickname)?

Losing every game in the best league in the world is still better than not making it there in the first place.  MC and the other SC2 heroes might not have been world-beaters in Brood War, but they were reasonably close.

Gaming and tits... again

MMO Champion posted some interesting statistics about character gender.  You can find the full data here.  The gist of it is that every playable race has more male characters than female - you probably expected that, right?  Well, there is one exception, and, somewhat surprinsingly, it's not Bloodelves.  They come 2nd, with 44.95% female characters.  No, number one, and the only race with over 50% representation for females is Draenei.  For those that don't play WoW, here's a clue as to why that might be the case:

Tuesday, 2 August 2011

I could be your hero, baby!

Before I get into today's rant, i want to make clear that as a commentator, i have a lot of respect for djWHEAT.  If you've read my blogs about commentators in the past, you'll know that's high praise indeed.  However, as a self-professed knight in shining armor here to save esports, presumably via talking a lot, he is sorely lacking.

Esports history became, if not a hot topic this weekend, then at least a lukewarm one.  An excellent, if narrow in perspective, thread popped up on TL, giving a brief rundown of some of the salient points in the story of our fledgling sport.  One comment particularly piqued my interest:

On August 01 2011 18:27 djWHEAT wrote:
This is great. I would love to work with the OP to add some awesome detail to this.

It's a great start but even as I read it I realise so much is missing (not necessarily absolute have to have facts, but interesting things fans would lobe to know!!)

Now, lets be clear: djWHEAT has been around for an awfully long time.  I don't doubt the fact that he could contribute useful insight to this kind of thread.  But the question is, where to begin?  Maybe he could contribute some of his righteous fury about the CGS.  You know, the league he worked for and was handsomely paid by?  CGS is a very important lesson, and who better to tell us about it than one of its most important broadcasters?  He could tell us how awful it was getting paid tidy sums to talk about computer games.

Of course, the most important thing about history is to learn the lessons from it for the future.  Again, djWHEAT's esports crusade comes to the fore:

Throwing money at something does not yield guarantee success. This Valve DotA2 thing is marketing. Don't call it anything else.

Fellow historians and oldskoolers will remember some league or other a few years ago that tried to throw money at games to guarantee success.  In fact, those games were far less popular than DoTA.  What was it called?  Oh, yes... CGS.  And who was their main commentator?  It couldn't be djWHEAT could it?  It could!  Who better to lead us into the battle against throwing money at a problem than the public face of the biggest waste of money in esports history?

Now, lets just hire Fatal1ty to tirade against over-exposure and we're set.