English lessons for commentators

Despite (okay, because of) the fact that most major Western esports commentators are American, they apparently can't speak English.  Good job they can shout "oh my god" and "I love this play" otherwise they'd just be noisy, irritating, wait... what?  Here are some simple lessons for any commentator, whether they're a budding upcomer or a veteran of yelling "ohhhhhhhh!"

• One Colossus; many Colossi (pron. col-oss-eye).
• "Wary of cheese" is not the same as "weary of cheese."
• The Day9 Rule: you can't just put "of" in front of every word, e.g. "too good of shape."
• "Casted" is not a word.  The past tense of cast is just cast.
• There are no degrees of perfect.  Something is either perfect or it isn't; it cannot be "quite perfect."
• Can Terran players pick up an opponent's base?  No?  Then they can't drop it either.

Probably more to come.  Many more.

Worst. MLG. Ever. And that's saying something

Esports writers and journalists can be a pretty cynical, bitter bunch - just like Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons.  I totally include myself in that category, but it's interesting to see the newcomers go through their "slag off everything that isn't by me" period (Hi, PrimeTime).  It's ugly and immature but we've all been through it (maybe i'll tell you the Fams story some time).  Still, I like to think esports has room for some people who aren't just happy-go-lucky-ignore-the-problem-it'll-go-away assholes.

Why do i bring this up now, after weeks of inactivity?  Well, firstly there's the fact that i wrote a column for Rakaka again today and it never rains but it pours.  But mostly, it warmed my cold, lifeless heart to see the MLG feedback.  Where normally the SC2 community is about as happy-go-lucky as you can find on the internet, even the shallowest of Team Liquid posters had to take a minute out of their busy schedules of typing the word "amazing" to point out the many flaws of the Dallas event.

I'm no tech-head, so i don't want to go into networking problems.  Certainly, MLG weren't helped by Blizzard's ridiculous anti-LAN attitude, but that hasn't stopped GSL or ESL.  Yes, the fates did conspire against MLG to some extent this weekend, but a company that is so full of hype and self-promotion should surely have some kind of contingency plan to back up the hyperbole, shouldn't they?

Frankly, there were so many problems at MLG that i don't really feel like sitting down long enough to go into detail.  Hopefully, in the middle of this massive boom that esports is currently experiencing, MLG will serve as a warning to the rest - and to themselves.  Do it right, or don't do it at all.

Score one for the cynics!

Ranking the rankings: how to run a tournament

League: Like in most European sports.  This rewards teams for consistency.  A team that consistently beats opponents over the course of a season can surely be called deserved winners at the end of it,  moreso than knockout play where luck can play a much bigger part.  In terms of sporting legitimacy, the league simply offers a larger sample size from which to draw results.  The problem with a league is actually a problem with the prevailing trend in esports since its inception; esports is based too much around one-off events with very few genuine leagues being run at all.  It takes time, coordination and continuous effort to run a league, which most tournament organisers seem unwilling to invest.


Read the whole column over at Rakaka

NASL: The good, the bad, and the speculation

So the bomb has been dropped: NASL is upon us. But after the initial explosion, survivors are left squinting bleary-eyed into the dust. For a lot of people, myself included, the announcement of America's potential answer to GSL has raised more questions than it answered. So, while this blog is based on little solid information and a lot of speculation, i'll attempt to break down the good and bad of what we know so far...

GOOD: "$400,000 in prizes over the course of three seasons." - Enough prize money to attract the best players. I guess nobody's surprised about Idra's homeword journey by now.

GOOD: “Daily matches, commentated live from a full studio.” – GSL is currently the hottest thing in esports, based on this format. If it ain’t broke…

BAD: “With people like JP, hopefully DjWheat, perhaps Day9. These people haven't been contracted but that's the idea.” – while that sounds good on the surface, the lack of certainty is worrying. I’d hate to have to watch with the sound of because of TotalBiscuit or that lispy guy from RageQuit.

BAD: “Part of the reason why a guy like Husky or HD or TotalBiscuit is successful…” the rest of this sentence is irrelevant. Just mentioning those two names anywhere near an event like this is worrying.

GOOD: “But at the same time, I'm going to feed professional grade commentary in the sense that I understand the game at its deepest levels.” – PHEW. Thank God.

BAD: “Every player is going to turn in a profile including a picture, but also answer some questions. Basically we're going to have back story.” – Bleh… this seems a bit tacked-on. I like the idea of pre-match statements from ESL but they never really worked as intended and the best ones were usually the ones that took the piss. This will have to be really well done or else it’s a waste of time.

GOOD: “Every team is going to be maxed out at five players.” Great! Encouraging competition and openness; excellent.

GOOD: “Every player is supposed to be backed by a $250 refundable fee. Essentially what it is, is every time they're rude or they're late or any kind of unforeseeable problems occur they'll be penalized $25 or $50 and that comes out of the refundable fee.” – This sounds fantastic. Lack of professionalism is one of the biggest things that sets Western esports back and hitting players in the wallet is a great way to combat that.

GOOD: Five divisions of ten players, played over nine week seasons. – League style play is obviously the best way to define the best player, but groups leading into the finals are a close second. Two players will progress from each group, making a total of ten. Five more will qualify from a playoff, how this will work exactly is unknown at the time of writing. Five is an awkward number for brackets, though.

BAD: “…able to enter a 1,000 man open tournament and then the number one player from that is in the final sixteen.” – Holy what the fuck?! That seems like an awful mess. This definitely needs to be re-examined by NASL. Firstly, a thousand being reduced to one single slot seems… random. You obviously can’t do best-of-three double elimination with so many players, but the flaws of best-of-one series’ are well known. Secondly, after all the hullabaloo over the invite/vote system that determines who will be in the main league, it seems strange that a complete random could make it to the LAN finals without even playing in the weekly season.

BAD: Lack of clarity. – Maybe it’s just my reading comprehension failing at 2AM, but this seems very, very unclear. Reading back that last paragraph, it seems hard to believe that a spot in the finals could go to someone who didn’t even play in the regular season but that’s what seems to be implied.

GOOD: “We're already sold on three seasons. The money has been budgeted and secured.” Anyone who knows their esports history knows how important this is (Hi, Clikarena, Hi, CPL). Usually I don’t care too much about the financial side of things, but at least this is somewhat reassuring.

GOOD: “It's all insured and backed by Blizzard, that kind of stuff.” – Oh right, ‘that kind of stuff.’ That’s a bit less reassuring, but assuming the Blizzard part is true and ignoring the “whatever” attitude, this is definitely good news.

UNSURE: “But [the production is] definitely a grass roots effort in the sense that we're not hiring out.” – I want this to be cool, and be all indie hipster-cum-SC2. But after watching the Clash of The Titans stream tonight, I’m not 100% sure about this one. On the plus side, they can only improve on that.

GOOD: “A whole season we're looking at maybe $20 to $25. For about fourteen weeks of pure content from this league we think that's remarkably accessible.” – I’m inclined to agree with the latter statement. It seems pretty reasonable to me.

ALARM BELLS RINGING: “Excited business minded individuals that want to get involve.” – Could this be that dreaded ‘mainstream?’ Hopefully the vagueness of “all this stuff” means no.

BAD: “There would be people in their moms basements that would mumble otherwise perhaps, but that would be my take on it.” – Insulting potential fans aside, I’m not sure about this guy’s attitude. I get that he’s the community figurehead guy but he hasn’t impressed me in the way he presents himself on-stream. There’s a reason Day9 and DJWheat are so sought-after.

GOOD: “One of the core sentiments of the league is to be player driven and that would not be a true sentiment if we were in direct conflict with an already established organization like MLG.” - While I’m not MLG’s biggest fan, what InControl says here is obviously true. Having more competitions is a good thing.

BAD: “But I can with confidence say that from my perspective this is the biggest announcement in Western eSports.” – Hyperbole and bullshit detector is going crazy right now. This whole “esports in the West is just beginning” shit really pissed me off. Even if it turns out to be true, there’s such a thing as modesty. Imagine how dumb this will sound (it already does, but bare with me) if it all goes tits-up. I’m starting to hope the guys behind the scenes have a bit more about them than the guy out front doing all the talking. Oh right, yeah, this is American, where everything is LOUD AND EXCITING or no-one cares.

Overall, I make that ten goods to seven bads. Not a resounding victory, but definitely cause for optimism. I’m not so sure that InControl is the best frontman for this and the league/playoff/qualifier format needs looking at again, especially the open qualifier. But if this genuinely turns out to be America’s GSL then I guess I can forgive the hype. While esports has been alive and healthy in the West for ten years, despite what TLers seem to think, NASL coming to fruition could really be the best thing that has happened to it.

But please, fix the open qualification!

Source interview: http://www.g4tv.com/thefeed/blog/post/710588/North-American-Star-League-Exclusive-Interview-with-Geoff-iNcontroL-Robinson.html

Ah, Koreans... you're fucking insane

With all the livestreaming and varying quality English language commentary SC2 fans are treated to nowadays, it's been a long time since i had to stay up till 4am to watch Grubby lose to Moon again. That's definitely for the better, but it also means i haven't listened to Korean commentary in months.

Having missed a lot of the GSTL, seeing a few VODs pop up on sc2rep.com was awesome so i immediately opened a dozen or so tabs and settled in.

Ah, the ridiculous melodrama. It seems so surreal when you compare it to the mild-mannered shrinking violets that make up most of the professional player base in Korea. These commentators, i'm sure, are certafiably insane, and this is coming from someone whose mother works in an asylum, so i have some idea. Every remotely interesting event is met with rollercoaster-like wails and screams. It's amazing that these people don't lose the ability to speak after a best-of-three series.

Not that any of this is new, but after having it go missing from my life for so long it's kind of re-assuring to know that it still goes on. If all of Asia is like this, i think i finally understand anime. The whole continent must be sort of like the mirror-opposite universe of Victorian Britain.

Carmac talks about IEM Europe

So, the dust has settled on the IEM European finals. Sjow won the SC2 tournament in highly impressive fashion and I think people want to know what a Bronze league player thinks about his performance.

Carmac: Well, as a bronze league player I'm not completely sure how excellent he was, but it definitely looked erm... good from my perspective.

White-ra had been seeminly infallible in recent weeks and maintained that form right the way to the finals of IEM Europe. Did you see any faults in his play in the final, or was it all about Sjow's excellence?

Carmac: As a bronze league player it's difficult to criticize a player like White-ra. Certainly, erm... he's better than me. But i think you should come back tomorrow and ask a pro gamer because i'm only erm... only a bronze league player

What do you think was the difference between the two players?

Carmac: As you know, erm... I'm only a bronze league player, but I think it was Sjow's control of erm... the Mega, no... Medivacs. The way he kept coole- erm... White-ra on his toes was highly impressive, and certainly not something you see in the bronze league.

Apart from Sjow, which players impressed you the most in Kiev?

Well, as a bronze league player, I was hugely impressed by everyone. Cloud's commentary was particularly erm... good when he replaced me, since I'm just a bronze league stand-in.

Thanks for your time.

Big fish leaving the small pond

Hey, It's been a while. Today i'm going to write something a bit more personal, about making the transition into SC2. Not solely for myself, but it will be mostly about me.

The dust has settled on my SK career and it's been about 2 months or so since i wrote a column. It was always a struggle to keep the Zechs Files weekly but this is by far the longest 'time off' i've had. I've written a few news stories for MYM in the mean time but i don't really count that stuff, and i haven't really done as many as i should have.

But i've started to realise that the reason for this is not just lack of inspiration (although that is part of the problem). Starcraft II is actually kind of intimidating. I'm usually someone who has the courage of my convictions and i laughed off 300-ish comments of pure vitriol back when i published "The man who is Ruining Warcraft." But the fact that is abundantly clear in retrospect is that the WC3 and WoW arena scenes where i was best known were far smaller than SC2's. Sure, i got record hits on SK by writing about those games but i was practically the only game in town. WC3 is big in China, but it never picked-up in English-speaking countries. WoW, on the other hand, is huge, but the competitive arena scene was miniscule by comparison. Gameriot was the only competitor but they didn't have the helping hand of the SK100 - easily the most popular single page in the arena community.

But suddenly with SC2, everything is on a much larger scale. Take commentary, for example. In WC3 there were only a handful of English language commentators. It was back then that i first thought of jumping in and doing it myself, but for some reason i just never did - laziness, probably. In Starcraft there are dozens of commentators, at least, and most of them are fairly well-known. The quality is generally appalling but that's beside the point. Even some of the most popular ones are God-awful in my opinion, but the community seems to be in love with them. Trying to break into the already well-established scene is actually quite scary. The fact that i want it so much actually puts me off rather than encouraging me. On top of that, i'm so hard on the other commentators that it would be kind of embarassing if i just sucked.

On the other hand i know that, logically, i should just get on with it and throw it out there but my ego won't seem to permit it.

How does this relate to my column? Well, it's a similar case. At least when it comes to writing i'm more well-known, but MYM already seems to be a backward step in terms of reputation. I know, i know, i shouldn't give a shit; i should be writing for the joy of it and for the noble art of argument and debate. But i do care, and i can't seem to easily get over it, which is stifling. When i was at the peak of my consistency at SK, i would often just sit down and write a column in 30 minutes or so, just to keep it going. Nowadays i don't feel like doing that. Is it just that my standards are higher? I don't know. Again, i know i should just get the fuck on with it.

This relates back to the games themselves. As a hugely competitive person, i take laddering far too seriously. It was like this in WC3 and WoW and the same thing is happening in SC2. I almost dread playing because i know how stressed i'll get if i lose, which in turn means i don't enjoy winning either. It makes the whole experience of SC2 far more intense than it actually should be and it makes me play much worse. At least, i hope that's true, because i need some excuse for my poor win/loss ratio!

But once again, the moral of that story is much clearer thanks to writing it down: bite the bullet and DO IT.

Stream of conciousness HWAITIIIIIIN. Thanks to Chris Schetter for the inspiration.